One of the best memes, ever

This one comes to us all the way from Athens, Georgia, courtesy of Nancy. Here it is:
You are in a mall when the zombies attack. You have:

1. One weapon.
2. One song blasting on the speakers.
3. One famous person to fight alongside you.

Now, there are a variety of ways to answer this, and since Nancy used “famous” to also mean fictitious (her answer for number #3 is Buffy the Vampire Slayer), I take this to mean anything goes. So here are my answers:

1. A Lightsaber. C’mon, hordes of the evil dead against Darth Maul? Yep, Lighsaber, all the way. A red, evil one, too. And I’ll look waaaaaay cooler than the YouTube kid. I’ll settle for the single blade. Maybe I’ll kill a few zombies before I manage to slice myself apart…

2. The first song that came to mind was “Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?”, and I think this says more about my psyche than my actual choice, “Bestrafe Mich” by Rammstein

3. Dita Von Teese. Why? The hot chick ALWAYS survives horror movies, thus increasing my odds. And if she dies, she’ll get naked first (sometimes, even if she lives). This is horror law. So before I die, I’m at least guaranteed to see boobies.

Or a lightsaber. WIN-WIN!

As I said before…

TS Eliot must have never met June.

Damn Good Dawg.

Ok, I get it…

No one likes it when I write about Atheism. I’ll keep my smug self righteous douchebaggery to myself

On of the many things I noticed on my trip to Denver was a sort of (very general) philosophical mold you could categorize each group of performing artists. Orchestral people, by our own admission, were the suits, and tended to be very conservative (in the literal sense, not the right wing sense) when it came to programming, policies, and generally anything that might be classed as radical or innovative.

On the other side tended to be the Theatrical types, and they were much more casual, and willing to try just about anything.

Opera tended to be somewhere in the middle, toward the orchestra side, and then dance, toward the theater side.

I think there are merits to both approaches, frankly. I found myself relating to the opera people the most (example: sure, your idea is cool, and we should do it, but we have to figure out how to pay for it first), and its one thing I wish that my job/office environment wasn’t so skittish out. My home orchestra has a very well thought niche of repertoire people are more or less guaranteed to love. And sometimes, just is this about all we play.

We’re trying though. And I think for me, being the impatient sort, slower can be better than faster.

What I liked best about this trip was being around all these creative types, ready and willing do discuss how to make art and how to make a living doing it. This part was awesome, and spurred much thinking and introspection during the ride. This is one of many reasons I cannot being married to a non musician, but someone else in the performing arts would have been ok, too.

The Denver style panhandler seemed to have migrated to Valentine Wofle HQ; Last night I was asked if I “could help me out with a Pepsi”, and when I said no, I was sarcastically thanked for my hospitality.

Fortunately, this is rare.

We have some exciting doins’ going on up here at the HQ, and I’ll unveil the Valentine Wolfe side of that soon.

A Long Time Ago…

I was going to comment on some past entries, especially one about an article on Atheism by Dr. Mike Adams. I’m too lazy to do that (but hell, I admit it). I’d rather write short, frequent updates about music and such, not re-visit the past. But since I brought it up…

The article needs at least 5 footnotes, and is one long logical fallacy (a straw man, to be exact). The lack of scholarship in this article is appalling (I was a child once, I’m no expert on child development. I have testicles, but I’m no expert on male reproductive health. I know people who own guitars, but this doe snot make them Jimmy Page. The fact that Dr. Adams was once an Atheist means jack shit), and what I find most disagreeable is that the article, in my opinion (see that, I’m honest…MY OPINION), tries desperately to carry a tone of authority because it comes from a “college professor”.

Personal Reflection is one thing. Accusing someone of ducking you in a debate because YOU don’t grasp the concept means that you should NEVER trust someone just because they have a doctorate.

ESPECIALLY if it is in music…

For the record, just about every Atheist I know would HAPPILY admit the are wrong about the existence of a god, provided you could, you know, prove it.

Progress…of sorts…

Wow…24 views yesterday, 1 today. Fascinating…

We are making leaps and bounds with our old editions. Rapunzel and Camera Obscura are ready to go as far as backing tracks are concerned, leaving only Club Rancour and Chanson D’ Enchantress needing any serious work. But alas, they need serious work…well, not so much, as we know what we’d like to do to each of them (mostly add some synth elements, tweak the drum sounds to something more Industrial/Electronic and give our Enchantress a new groove). My hope is that soon, we’ll be able to rotate a new “Fab Four” into our MySpace list.

But wait…There’s more!

We’ve about 3 new songs in the sketch phase we’re quite fond of. Usually, I just improvise a bit, and Sarah will perk up when she hears something she likes. Then I play  it a few more times, see what I can make of it, then…we DON’T record it. We figure that if I can remember it a week later, it must be a quality riff. Right now, we’ve two Rabbath sounding riffs that we’ll do something very Emily Autumn to, and then one which is just a heavy  and chromatic thing.

I’ve more Denver tales to tell, but I’m having too much fun creating. But I will say this: even though my politics are left of center (as if anyone reading this could NOT figure that one out), I think you have to be a class A dumb fuck to think the creation of a Department of Culture is a great idea. ESPECIALLY from the morons who brought you the Patriot Act, No Child Left Behind, TSA, and did such a great job helping Mississippi and New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina. You REALLY think that giving those fuckers control over the creative process and naming an “Arts Czar” is a good thing? As I said…class A dumb fuck…

or a socialist…take your pick.

Enough Said…

Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker, and Tits

Fuck April…what’s June’s problem?

Whirlwind Weekend

It has been a busy two days, both inside and outside of Valentine Wolfe HQ. First, we are thrilled to unveil the final version of Sweet Little Poisoned Love song. We slapped it up on our MySpace just a few minutes ago: we like the way it sounds much, much more now. We’ve also tweaked a few things about it to give it more of a naughty Victorian feel, courtesy of Sarah’s reading voice and Aleister Crowley’s text. We’re so…DARK!

But it is a fun song.

We also traveled to a lake in the northern part of South Carolina to celebrate a dear friend’s birthday. The lake was nice and secluded, and we had a great time meeting new people and seeing new sights. Sarah and I are discussing the viability of one day setting up shop in a semi-remote resort type locale (we like A/C and internet) to do some recording. Clearly, our idea of a fun vacation is not everyone’s.

I cannot remember the last time I’ve so thoroughly enjoyed making music. And I’m so lucky to be married to an awesome musician and collaborator.

More soon.

Denver, Part 2

Re-mixing goes well, and we’re actually putting together some new songs…I may put the improvisation that spawned the newest batch of ideas up on our MySpace later today, so check that out.

Denver was very, very cool. When I first got there, I thought I was about to be scammed by the Airport shuttle guys, fighting a mixture of being too polite and too paranoid. But I arrived downtown with kidneys and wallet intact, so my fear was unfounded. I hung around the 16th Street Mall, specifically the Virgin Megastore the first night (no conference stuff until the next day at 2). Denver has a sort of euro feel to it, especially Milan. Denver also has some SERIOUSLY aggressive panhandlers. As in, they are hands on and angry if you say no to them.

Ever since I read an article from Madison, Wisconsin (that I can’t be bothered to cite. Do what I do: Google is your friend) that quoted empirical evidence that most homeless a) don’t want to be and b) as a result, don’t panhandle…they’re too busy trying to not be homeless and c) most panhandlers are addicts who can’t be bothered to do anything else, I’ve had very little patience for the whole concept. BTW-This is NOT your cue to comment with your no doubt heart warming anecdote that illustrates not ALL pan handlers will fit in my broad category. I know that. I’m smart enough to know that broad generalizations have exceptions, and I’m kind of assuming my readers do, too.

Where was I? Oh yeah…Anyway, I just really enjoyed the laid back atmosphere of Denver, but without the laid backness resulting in no one having any of their shit together (Italy, I’m looking at you).  Next, I’ll give some highlights about the conference, in which I encounter various schmucks, hear some pretty cool music, and miss my bass terribly.

And Go Broncos.

-Bo

I Love Helpful Software…

You know, the kind that has resulted in three posts in one day, rather than three posts on three days, a cryptic reference to part 2 of a post where part 1 wasn’t even out yet, and the resulting post explaining everything.

Sigh.

I know, you can say its operator error all you like, but if you do, then I say (in the words of Eddie Izzard) you’re probably the sort who watches the belt bit on the airplane.

More tomorrow.

Denver, Part 1

I have a dream. Well, more of a goal. Actually, just something I kinda want to do. Which is start providing more frequent, shorter updates. In fragments…nah, I’ll throw in some complete sentences, every now and then.

So why the lack of updates? I was in Denver. The Mile High City. For work (orchestra convention).

Ok, ok, I’ll stop. Last Tuesday, I packed my bags and headed out to Denver. Though I’m somewhat well traveled, I’ve only been out west to go to Las Vegas. Denver is very cool, and I’ll add little details this week about my trip and what I learned and checked out and other stuff (LOTS of drinking. I’m a bit sick of beer at the moment, if anyone can believe it. I’m also getting more critical of current gubment policy, re: TSA. I don’t feel even remotely safer with those guys around, and the conclusion I keep coming back to is that this is more about a legal way to invade a citizen’s privacy than it is about “thwarting terror”. My airport experience was slightly Orwellian.

Back soon for Part 2.

-Bo

Ah yes, some cool Valentine Wolfe news is on the way, and we have a new MySpace Layout.